23 Feb Finding and Protecting Your Light | Kelly Lovell
Young people are constantly bombarded with messages on how and who to be. It can be easy to adapt someone else’s expectations of you to your perception of yourself. But the truth is, you have to find and protect your own light.
WELCOME TO THE DARIN OLIEN SHOW
Kelly Lovell’s light shines bright. And now she helps other young people find their own.
As an entrepreneur and thought leader, Kelly Lovell focuses most of her energy on the youth. Kelly’s accolades are ridiculously impressive. She is CEO of her two companies BridgingTheGap Ventures and My Effect. These innovative businesses help bridge the opportunity gaps to prepare young people for their futures and solve global challenges. She’s also the Founder and Global Chair of the YOUNGA Forum. This pioneering global youth takeover of the UN uses VR technology to connect young changemakers with decision-makers to create solutions for a better world. That’s not even a fraction of this girl’s amazing accolades.
But before Kelly had all this light in her life, there was a lot of darkness. Struggling with mental health issues, Kelly spent most of her high school years isolated in a hospital, unable to do the things that had defined her until that point. Forbidden to participate in any academics, Kelly would secretly read textbooks underneath the covers at night. But she eventually found a way to get her high school credits and graduated on stage with her class. Finding her new identity, and stipping away all others’ expectations of her, inspired her to find a way to do the same for other young people. Kelly is now one of the leading youth advocates in the world. She even received the Youth Leader Award from Queen Elizabeth herself.
In this episode, Kelly and I have the most amazing conversation about the journey of finding yourself. Kelly is so full of life, so full of positivity, it’s hard to imagine her surrounded by anything but good. That’s what makes her story of struggle so incredibly compelling. I really hope my listeners of all ages pay attention to this one. She has so many poignant things to say about the power of self-discovery and why we all need to fight hard to find and protect our own lights.
ALSO IN THIS EPISODE:
- The amazing story of Kelly’s high school years
- Her lowest point and what she learned from it
- Rebuilding your identity
- Finding your light
- How to Protect Your Light
- Alternative learning
- What we can learn from the darkness
Darin: You are listening to the Darin Olien Show. I’m Darin. I spent the last 15 years exploring the planet looking for healthy foods, superfoods, environmental solutions, and I’ve had my mind blown along the way by the people, the far off places I have been, and the life-altering events that have changed my life forever. My goal is to help you dive deep into some of the issues of our modern-day life, society’s fatal conveniences. The things that we do that we’re indoctrinated into thinking we have to, even though those things are negatively affecting us, and in some cases, slowly destroying us and even killing us. Every week, I have honest conversations with people that inspire me. My hope is through their knowledge and unique perspectives they’ll inspire you too. Together, we’ll explore how you can make small tweaks in your life that amount to big changes for you, the people around you and the planet, so let’s do this. This is my show, the Darin Olien Show.
Darin: Hey, everybody, welcome to the show. Thanks for tuning in. This one is awesome. She is so inspiring. Such a young, powerful, driven, entrepreneurial, she is kicking some ass, Kelly Lovell. I’ve done some projects with her connected to the UN. She’s a 19-time award-winning young entrepreneur. She has been going after future current global challenges. She’s the CEO of two companies, Bridging the Gap Ventures and My Effect and Founder and Global Chair of the YOUNGA Forum, which is I was a part of, incredible event, pioneering global youth to take action. The YOUNGA Event was taking over with the kids with solutions at the United Nations using VR, using technology, the youngest changemakers from around the globe. Literally, she’s a three-time TEDx speaker, global influencer. Kelly’s insights have been featured in the world’s most respected platforms, including of course the UN, High-level Political Forum, G7, G20, W20, consultations, and the World Bank. Her accolades include top 30 under 30 sustainable leaders, Canadians most powerful woman, WXN Top 100, and the Queen’s Youth Leader Award, a prestigious honor given to Kelly by Her Majesty at Buckingham Palace. Kelly is just infectious and driven and clear. And her life story of all that she’s gone through and all that she’s had to overcome, the mental health side of things. She can help so many children and leaders and kids right now regardless of age, but certainly of age and people going through with this pandemic, Kelly has climbed her way through mental health challenges. And we get into that story, and it’s so touching and so powerful. And yet, through all of that, she said yes to life. And she figured out what she can do to make a change and not give her power away anymore. And so I am so grateful and honored to have her as a friend, and be involved with projects with her and talk to her and let her share her message to you. Regardless of age, you will be impacted and touched by Miss Kelly Lovell.
Darin: I’m now excited and looking and then reading all about what you’ve done, I just get so stoked for everything that you’re cultivating and everything that you’re creating for the Gen Z’s and for kids of your viewpoints and the opportunities that you’re kind of laying out there for people, and you’re such an advocate for change and opportunity. So I’m just, as a fellow human, I’m just stoked to have you here.
Kelly: Thank you. I’m really excited to join you on this podcast and you are such an incredible mentor to our YOUNGA youth delegates, and we’ve already had a couple deep dives into the conversations. So I’m excited to like turning the table. So I’m really excited for this talk.
Darin: That’s right, turn the tables. You’re highlighting a lot of people and you’re doing a lot of things, but you just you need to be celebrated, and I love all of those. You’ve been recognized in so many different ways. I kind of want to just go back to kind of create an on-ramp here for people to understand what you’re doing because I know there’s a lot of people in the Gen Z’s now that are tuning in more than ever, tuning in to me because of the show. And so I want to definitely create this opportunity for you to kind of on-ramp them into some possibilities. But before we dive into some of that, I’m touched by how young you’ve created so much, and let’s go back to that spark. What occurred where you then became an entrepreneurial person, realized that you had a gift and can contribute to so many other things? So what was that moment?
Kelly: Yeah, so my mission is really to bridge the gap to the future. So I’ve always focused on, well, starting in my career, really focusing on bridging opportunity gaps for young people to prepare for the changing workplace and develop the skills that they needed to ideally implement creative solutions to world problems. Social Innovation has always been kind of my North Star. I believe innately humans are creators, and we’re innate. When you look at life, it’s always about how do we improve, and how do we create solutions to some of the pressing problems that we’re facing today. I think youth have such a wealth of knowledge and fresh perspective. And so my journey started as a young entrepreneur myself. I incorporated my company at 19. And really though, I started as a motivational speaker, and that was through as a young leader myself, I was your classic A-type overachiever growing up, involved in all the clubs, your student council, dancer, I did it all. And but my life took a turn really quickly as I entered into my teens. I started to become ill. I’m just around the age of 14 and went into severe mental health ailments that put me into hospital for three years. So I spent basically all of high school away from society, isolated on my own. And during that time, I was stripped of all of the roles and responsibilities in things that I had originally defined myself to be because as a young person innately as you start off, you kind of define yourself by what you do. So you’re the dancer, you’re the academic, you’re the athlete, whatever it is, the artist. And so when I had that all taken away, I realized I didn’t know who I was. And I didn’t know what my spark was. I was a dancer since the age of three but did I really like dancing or was that just because my parents put me in dance and then I just attached myself to that? And so I went through kind of this deep introspection as a young teen on defining myself and discovering what my purpose was because I was faced with some really real realities of if I didn’t recover, would I be remembered? And how would I be remembered and I realized that I wanted to leave a legacy of impact. I wanted to do something of substance, these other things that I thought were important were hollow shells, they didn’t have substance, these roles and these projects, and so on. And so when I recovered, I started as a motivational speaker, sharing my stories and my struggles with my peers. It was a way of almost self-healing as well to be able to really kind of follow that journey and start to understand the wisdom or why I went through those experiences. And what happened was, as I shared my story with my peers, I got this overwhelming response that a lot resonated and started to come to me sharing similar struggles, not always in the same form but similar struggles of not knowing their path and feeling lost and isolated and feeling this pull to want to make an impact, but how and where to get started. And so there was a lot of confusion and lack of direction and that’s really what started my North Star of being that light for my peers to help them navigate and find their own path. And so that snowballed into essentially starting to create resources for youth to be able to become changemakers. And the first step to doing that was actually interviewing my peers. I started in media creating positive media, interviewing changemakers, and eventually then celebrities on their leadership journeys, and how they found their passion and purpose, and started to build this network of young changemakers around the world. And that then eventually led me into creating actual resources and programs to then support those changemakers in developing or scaling their ideas. And that’s kind of how it all started. But basically, to answer your question, how I found my spark was, in a lot of sense, first stripping myself of all of the kind of things that we– I had to unlearn all the things I learned as a youth, and then becoming lost, so I could be found.
Darin: Wow, well, there is certainly a lot there. I mean, because what you’re describing is something that I think many people, no matter what age goes through, or can go through. And the cultivation of who you are, what you are, where you’re going, what your contribution is, are some really, really powerful questions to ask and the fact that you went through those, that kind of in certain terms or like dark night of the soul, or whatever that stripping is of identity, and then building back up again. The fact that you went through that at 14-15, like that age is phenomenal.
Darin: So for years, maybe most of my life, people have been asking me, “What kind of foods do you eat? What kind of exercises do you do? What kind of water should I drink?” All of these things and so much more we put into a 21-day program so that can take you through a theme every day of knowledge, action, and then eating these delicious meals, working out, getting support, anchoring in these new habits so you can do what? So that you can kick ass. So you have the energy, the vitality to live the kind of life that you really want. That’s what it’s all about. So all in this app, we have grocery lists, we have education about real hydration and what greater oxygenation and the balance of alkalinization. All of these things we are diving into as you’re heading down this hero’s journey of implementation into a new life to give you the kind of life that you actually want. So join my Tribe. All you have to do is go 121tribe.com. Sign up, and you get three free days. Join me on this hero’s journey. Join the Tribe.
Darin: You took all that mental health challenges and all of the stripping that occurred and then what was that moment where you realize like, oh, I can creatively build myself up again. And just a little bit on what that was and then obviously, some of the fruits of that are playing out all over the place. And also the fact that you started motivatingly speak, but also just sharing your story that I think anyone can resonate with for sure.
Kelly: Of course, and so really that moment for me was– and I don’t know if it was probably a mix of a little bit of teenage rebellion fire in there as well. But essentially, what happened was around 16-17 when I was at kind of my lowest point, I lost my last piece of hope, it was taken away. So what happened was I lost stance in my family and all these other things, but the one thing that was able to hold on to my early stages of being in hospital was my academics. And so I use my academics as an outlet. And I poured my emotion, my focus. It was a way for me to channel and really kind of focus amidst what was going on into something constructive. And academics has always been personally a passion. I’ve always loved learning ever since I was very little. And so what happened was in the later stage, the doctors actually forced me to drop out of school. They thought that it was too stressful, and by all the resources and statistics, no one at my stage had been able to handle school. And so basically, they took away my future. They basically said, “All these dreams you thought you’re gonna have, you’re not gonna have them. You can’t do school. It’s impossible.” And that was kind of the straw that broke the camel’s back, so to speak. It just lit this fire in me and I was like, “Who’s to tell me what my future is supposed to hold? This is my life, my future.” And so I took my future into my own hands. I read accounting and calculus textbooks, literally under covers, in hiding away from the nurses when they couldn’t see it because they would take my books away if they found them. And I taught myself school. And what happened was around the time that would have been grade 12, I ended up being able to get all the credits I needed for school through alternative learning because my actual school wasn’t allowed to give me homework, they weren’t allowed to because I need a doctor notes for that. So I had to do it through different means. And I ended up getting all my credits and was able to graduate and get my diploma on stage with the rest of my class through doing this alternative pathway. And that for me really showed that I literally and figuratively was capable of defining my future. And that’s what inspired me to share my story. And then the second layer to that is when I came back to society and my community, as much as I did that, I was still very lost because I hadn’t been around any one of my peers in like years. And so I got involved in volunteering and giving back. And this is where the community element came in and the social component because I was able to discover the other pieces of myself through these community projects. And these pathways I found were not traditional. They were not what were shown as like your traditional pathway to success, but they’re assessable to everyone. And that’s what inspired me the most is like it didn’t matter where you came from, it didn’t matter if you’re a school dropout, if you couldn’t afford to do enrichment programs. It doesn’t matter if you didn’t have the support system, anyone can volunteer. Anyone can kind of do these self-directed learning pathways that I took on. And that’s when inspired me to start to share my story to show my peers that there’s another way. There are other pathways than the ones that you’re being shown. And if those don’t resonate with you, you still have options. And that’s really what inspired me to start.
Darin: Kelly, that’s amazing. I mean, it just goes to show the spark and the fire that you have in you to figure out another way. And I love the fact that listen, I think “authorities” are dumping some ideas on us all the time. They’re saying, well, you can’t do this, you can’t do that. And there was a final point where you said no way. And then you continue down on that path to create a whole new way of doing it. It’s really like outside of the box thinking is really always creating some of the greatest things in life, as well as the most fulfilling, but yet, we have these systems in place that seem to try to conservatively tell us how it’s supposed to go and you just bucked that system completely, and now showing people how to do it. I mean, it’s the human spirit that you’re demonstrating so powerfully. And I think it’s so easy right to give our power away to authorities and to people. And it’s not doing harm. It’s literally finding what works inside of you and following that path. So your path, your unconventional path started laying the bricks for other people to think differently so that they could then form their own path that may or may not be there, and that’s incredible. And so how do some of those things show up? Because I know people are listening from every walk, from any age group, and we’re all stuck sometimes. So what are the tools you’re giving? Let’s go back to the young kids too because I love the fact that kids, especially now more than ever, need to not take the conventional information as the rules, as the law. We need to develop and us as older people, we need to listen and to see there are other ways of doing things. So what are some of the steps now you’re taking and the runway that you’re creating for some of these changemakers?
Kelly: Yes, of course. As you’re saying that, one of the quotes that came to mind, and I think it’s Maya Angelou or someone who says the words, “The first step of giving away your power is believing you don’t have it.” So the first is really acknowledging that you do have that personal power. But to your point, I’m going to give an analogy that I think is really, I’m a visual person so sometimes these help. We’re innately the human spirit, we’re a light. We’re here to shine. And what happens is think of you as you’re like a magnet. You’ll attract all these labels, these systems restrictions that other people throw on you, these judgments, etc. So as a child, you start off and these stick on to you, all these judgments. Well, you’re not good at art, you’re good at this, you’re supposed to do this, you’re not supposed to do that. And you become, and what happens is, they stick on to you so much that all of a sudden, your light is completely blocked because they’re all over you and they’re like covering your light. And so the first thing is to actually understand what’s sticking on to you? What are you holding on to, and what’s not yours? So start to pulling off the things that like, oh, that’s a label that I learned when I was 10. I’m not that, I can do more. I’ve already learned I can do that. And start to pull these off to really, first off, discover that spark and that light again. And then the second thing from that is, I will say, in those moments, those difficult moments like I saw no life, it was a very tough period, I was very deep, deep down. And then at the same time, and I will say this, those deep moments are your gems because that is what we’re here for. We’re here to learn and grow and you don’t evolve your soul if life was easy. And so looking at my journey, I was forced in that situation to your point to look outside the box to find alternative new pathways. And now full circle, now after kind of over these last 10 years, what I’ve done is now I’m actually in a position where I’m creating an actual digital academy for alternative learning pathways to retrofit and change education for peers around the world. My pathway helped pave a way for me to identify other ways of learning that now I can create solutions for my peers. So what I learned is, there are reasons why everything happens. And in those dark moments are usually when I look back in my career, it’s not actually, and I’ve had some really cool achievements like I’ve been standing in Buckingham Palace, shaking the Queen’s hand, and just like things that are just like, how did I end up here? But those are the moments that I remember the most. The moments I remember the most are these more darker periods, but I look at it with new lights because I see like, oh, that’s what taught me about my spirit, or that’s what taught me about my strength or different things like that.
Darin: Yeah, that’s a really, really powerful thing because it’s like that whole thing of, you know, I always say life’s not happening to you, it’s happening for you. And even though when you’re in those dark periods, it doesn’t feel great at all. You’re kind of surviving, you’re doing but it is that opportunity for the cultivation and the digging down. And like you said, through some of these ulterior alternative ideas of who we think we are, but into the sole bowel of who and what we are. And from there, that the gem. And so again, I think anyone listening can understand that. So one thing, before we get into some of that other amazing groundbreaking alternatives that you’ve created, what are some of the tools and techniques you think? If someone’s listening going, I don’t know what’s holding my light back? I don’t know what sticking to me yet? What are some things that you find is helpful? I mean, as a caveat, I think life does a very good job of kind of slapping us around and showing us our judgments, our limitations on all of those things. But what are some of the active things that you think are powerful for people to take to kind of uncover the unconscious or to unmask those things that may be holding us back?
Kelly: And yes, I actually have two ideas on that. The first is the one that I’ve been practicing actually most right now is the power of silence. And I know we’ve talked about this a bit. Life is full of distraction, and it’s purposely distractive because it creates noise, you can’t actually hear your soul and what your heart and what you’re truly trying to move forward. And so as soon as you can shut off some of those distractions, you’ll actually be able, without trying to sound poetic, but you’ll hear your heart speak. You’ll be able to truly start to hear your inner voice of who you are. And I think that’s really important because we often have other people’s voices in our heads. When we hear certain things that are kind of more innate, sometimes those are things that other people have told us, and not truly how we feel deep down. So finding periods of silence and sitting with that as uncomfortable as it is, I have to be go go go. I don’t like to sit still, and so that was hard to do in the initial stages, but you get better at it and you become clear on what you’re discerning, which is your voice and which isn’t. And the second technique that I would also recommend when it comes to really trying to figure that out is start to look for patterns. And not just specifically patterns in terms of what keeps going wrong in your life. For instance, if you always have relationships that end in a certain way, you always fight about certain things, you always like get to a deal but at the last moment, the deal falls through. Start to realize that life keeps repeating the thing until you learn the lesson. So if you keep seeing something reappear and it’s like you’re always in an abusive relationship, you’re always in a spot that you don’t have money to pay for something like whatever it is, start to realize that and then know, okay, what are the factors or how did I end up here? And why do I keep ending up here because you’ll start to see that there’s a lesson, there’s something here before you can move on, like a video game. You got to master that before you can move on to the next level.
Darin: That’s right. And I think that’s so important and technically hard to do because you have to have enough space that you don’t offend yourself. Because you’re really saying like, listen, I am at the center of everything that’s occurring in my life. And if I have repeating patterns and different characters that are in and out of those patterns, but I am the central figure, then maybe I am at a collaboration with whatever challenge or opportunity is there because that’s also for the good as well. But that self-investigation is tricky because it’s so easy. And like you said, this world is so distractingly heavy that it’s so easy to point and say, well, if that person would have only done this, I wouldn’t have been here, so obviously it’s not my fault. But yet if these patterns are persistent, what you’re suggesting and what I absolutely 1,000% believe in and agree with is you are at the center of those repeating patterns and those are opportunities to investigate and to learn from, and that doesn’t stop either. It’s always an opportunity to learn about ourselves and to grow. And if you don’t want to grow, if you don’t want to look at yourself, it’s kind of like you don’t get to move to the next level of the game. So if you want all of these aspirations, inspirations, goals, houses, cars, happiness, whatever, it takes a level of, you got to give up certain things that haven’t allowed you to get there. And like you said, letting the light back in because of some of these, you know, the labels and things like that. And some of the first ones we get is from our parents. They’re not intending to do that. We may experience something or heard something and we have thought that that is ours and that may have come from the parents. And so that usually is the starting point and a good place to start. Maybe that’s not what I believe in and you can change up what those mechanisms are.
Darin: Many of you who follow me know I’ve spent most of my life searching for the healthiest foods on the planet from the Amazon jungle to the Andes of Peru, to the Himalayas and Bhutan, to the deserts of Africa, and everything in between discovering hundreds of plants and herbs and superfoods like this is my passion. Things like sacha inch, an Incan treasure, wild [unintelligible 00:31:41] mushrooms, things like Maya nuts, another Aztec superfood, wild cocoa moringa, many adaptogenic herbs and on and on and on. If you look hard enough, there are a few unknown extraordinary foods around the world that people still don’t know about. And a few years ago, I came across my favorite superfood discovery of all time, barukas nuts. Why is that my favorite? Well, when I first tasted them, my eyes lit up. I was blown away. They’re so delicious with notes of popcorn and cocoa and chocolate with peanut butter, and with this amazing crunch, so the taste alone just absolutely blew me away. But after sending them to the lab, which I do, and getting all the tests, I realized they’re the healthiest nuts on the planet. No other nut even compares. They have an unusually high amount of fiber, which is critical for healthy digestion. We’re all getting way too low of fiber in our diet and it’s good for the healthy bacteria and microbiome. And they’re off the charts in super high antioxidants, and have few calories than any other nut. It’s jam-packed with micronutrients. And what they don’t have is just as important as what they do have because they’re found in the forest in the savanna what’s called the Cerrado biome of Brazil, not grown on a plantation or a farm. They’re untouched by industrial pesticides, larvicides, fertilizers. They’re truly a wild food. But they’re not just good for you, they’re really good for the planet. Most other nuts require millions of gallons of irrigated water, not to mention, using bees and shipping them across the United States and just horrible sustainable practices just to grow certain nuts annually, but Baruka trees require no artificial irrigation. At one time, the Cerrado’s forest were made up of millions of these trees. These trees are incredible. They’re nitrogen fixers. They give back to the other plants in the forest. Their grandfather of sacred trees, but most of them were chopped down to make way for cattle, soy, and corn production. When you’re down in Brazil, it can be absolutely shocking. And actually, I’ve cried several times with miles and miles of deforested land filled with soy farms. This beautiful Savanna filled with soy farms and cattle grazing. Our mission is to reverse that. And the long term goal is to plant 20 million new baruzeiro trees throughout the Cerrado. And if that wasn’t enough, we are also providing highly beneficial and fair jobs for thousands of indigenous people so they can stay on their land and they can thrive with this consistent income every year forging and working with Barukas. Barukas are truly good for you, good for the planet, and good for the world community. It’s a win all the way around. I really think you’ll love them, so I’m giving all of my listeners 15% off by going to barukas.com/darin. That’s B-A-R-U-K-A-S dot com backslash Darin, D-A-R-I-N and using the code “Darin” at the checkout. I know you will enjoy.
Darin: And so I love this because this is such an empowering and necessary toolset that you have clearly gone through and continuing to cultivate but also then providing to this Gen Z, for lack of a better word, anyone really, but the Gen Z’s. So if someone’s listening to this and they’re just like, man, I want to get involved. I want to learn more about myself. I have goals. I want to align with the right people. What are some of my next steps?
Kelly: Well, step one is definitely feel free to connect with me and my organization on bridgingthegapventures.com. This year, we’re going to be releasing a membership community that will have ongoing content that specifically deep dive into these topics. So you can find your pathway and connect with mentors to help you overcome and scale you in your journey. And then also just kind of building upon that as well because I know your communities also tend to be passionate about things like the environment and things. So I think it’s really great to kind of end it off with an analogy around, if you think about life and nature, you can see lif like nature’s a perfect model for life and what we go through. And the very essence of life is change. If something does not change, we consider it dead. If a seed does not sprout, it’s dead. If a tree does not grow, it is dead. And so if you are not changing, you’re not living. And when you are going through a lot of changes, that is also life, that is the essence of life. So if we start to flip our perspective, that changes that. And realize that change is actually life and that’s good, it should be invigorating, it should be encouraging, it means you’re moving forward, you’re leveling up. And that’s one way that I’ve learned to be able to deal with more of the blips in the road along the way during harder periods is just reminding myself like, it means I’m growing, this is life and I’m living. So that’s one, just a reminder in a nice little analogy there. But definitely what I would say is, look at your environment, look at what are you feeding on? What are the content you’re consuming? Who’s around you? Are you in a supportive environment to grow? Is it negative and pushing you down? Because to your point, if we see ourselves as the center to what’s happening in our lives, it also puts us in a position of power to change that and make incremental changes that help put you in a more positive environment to grow and thrive. And it can start very immediate with just the people in your life or who you’re following on social media, the type of news you’re watching, the frequency that you’re listening to, certain stories and belief systems. And I would say the last piece is, the best way to start is actually to go back to unlearn of all your beliefs. The way I did it is kind of like, actually letting go of everything of all beliefs and starting to then re-find yourself in those beliefs. So if you just start tomorrow, and say, everything I learned is no longer. And do it like a baby, just starting all over again. You’d be surprised where you end up. And sometimes you come back to those same beliefs, but with greater reverence of where they came from and what they actually mean, as opposed to a doctrine or a practice that you just did because you automatically kind of learned to do it or think that way. And you know that it’s coming from a place of who you are and what you stand for, as opposed to just where you grew up.
Darin: Yeah, that’s so massively wonderful. I think that aspect of you, I mean, you embody that because I, I didn’t even know that backstory of what you went through, and the fact that you’re embodying that, and you’re representing that, and also creating that platform, Kelly, I just want to say that’s awesome and keep doing your thing. And speaking to magnetism, you and I are speaking because of the same laws. We would have never spoken if you didn’t find the place in you to come up and reach out and learn about yourself and let go of all these things and re-capitulate yourself, so reconstitute yourself. And now look, and that’s the thing, people underestimate the small choices added up over time create the life. So we want this magic bullet. We want this magic pill. We want this lottery ane take us through all of this stuff. But to your point, it’s an active thing that you can create that in your life, but taking off these labels, sometimes one at a time and go, that’s not what I believe. What do I do? I mean, that’s an exercise people can take right now and that is sitting down, pretend. gestalt for a second that you have no beliefs, zero. And you are plopped in a human body, male, female, etc., and you are in it. So now, who are you? What do you believe? What do you care about? What do you want to be? What do you want to do? What do you want to generate? Who do you want to hang out with? How do you want to express in the world? I mean, man, let’s carry let’s create that as a movement, Kelly. We’ll create that.
Kelly: I love that. It is the perfect practice, and I couldn’t think of a more right time to do this practice because we are literally at the brink right now where we have an opportunity to create a new world and tower moments as much as they are can be devastating and painful. They clear the ground to plant new seeds and new beginnings. And this is a great opportunity for you to do that in your own life. And to your point, those small incremental changes and decisions you make add up over time. And you might not see the change and shift right away, but I guarantee you a year from now, two years from now, you will start to see and what’s going to happen is one time, you’re gonna wake up and realize what a different place you’re in. So a couple of years ago, it isn’t something you just wake up tomorrow and you feel better, but I guarantee you that those choices matter and they do shift you. Someone likened to me before, it’s like moving giant stones. Like if you think of like, they showed in TV and movies sometimes like the giant chess pieces, and so on and you’re like slowly moving one piece because it’s like 20 times the size of you. But if you slowly turn it, eventually, all of them turn together, and then you can turn the wheel.
Darin: Exactly, yeah. You can’t expect to expect all of these changes right away because it’s like if you set your course for Australia, and I’m sitting here in the US, if I’m off 1 degree, if I’m hanging out with a bunch of people that really, you know, not the great, they don’t support me that well and all of that stuff, well, that 1 degree added up over time, you’ll end up in Siberia. If you go across the planet, you’re one degree off, you’re gonna be exponentially off or if you set your degree now to your true north, to your inspiration, to your heart, to that magnetic compass of kind, caring, and creativity, then imagine where you’re going when that compass is set towards that. And like you said, time cruises by so fast and even though we’ve all went through as a global community, the hardest year that anyone can ever think about. So now what? So now what are you gonna set your course on to create for your life and that’s it, and strip yourself away, build yourself back up, what do you care about, what do you want to do, and you can do that every day, like journal and meditate and go within even though that sounds all crazy to some people, that’s the only way. Because you discovered when that final straw that broke your back that you’ve realized that there was this deep inside of you that needed to be led out, and it was led out through the pain and through breaking that last little straw. And we can set our course to something extraordinary, but we also didn’t have to wait until everything’s stripped away. We can say, what do we believe in now and what are we going towards. So Kelly, what are some of your final thoughts on maybe just from 2020 and what would you say now because you have a lot of things in place, you have a lot of opportunities for people to step in, but what would you say as a final thought from everything we’ve gone through to everything that’s potentially upon us?
Kelly: I think we’re in the time of recalibration globally and as humanity. And so the best way to start is recalibrating inward so you can be the best light outward because one thing that I did learn in my journey is when I did start to– I dived right into my mission right away. And in the way by doing so without calibrating and first coming into my personal power, I lost myself because I was so preoccupied with shining on light with other people that again I lost where my source was so I think right now particularly with the state of the world, finding very clear of what your inner core is and what your true north is and keeping reminders of that is really important because life is full of distractions and even when you do that work, it’s a continual thing, it’s not like one and done and you do as like, okay, I know my north star. When you’re sailing, you have to continually check that you’re on course throughout the journey because the wind could change and then you’re blown off course. You got to keep going and keep it. So putting some personal checks and accountability in place, I would recommend for our listeners. And also just a reminder that it only takes one light to remove darkness. You can be in a completely dark room, like one candle and light always can shine, and so you just got to find it and preserve it and protect it. And what I mean protected, that means being conscious in making good choices of who you surround yourself with, the types of habits that you develop and so on, nurture and take care of yourself and make sure that you don’t abuse your life and your vessel because in doing so then you’re not able to serve your mission or the community that you may be passionate about.
Darin: That’s so well said. So beautiful, Kelly. I love you. I love what you’re doing. I’m so grateful for you. I want to continue staying in touch with you and helping you in any way I can, I will, for sure.
Kelly: Thank you so much. I really appreciate you having me on your show. Also, if any of the listeners have questions, I welcome you all to connect and I love learning about your stories and seeing how we can help you find your north star.
Darin: Right on.
Darin: That was a fantastic episode. What was the one thing that you got out of today’s conversation? If today’s episode struck a chord with you, and you want to dive a little deeper on a variety of topics, check out my live deep dives on darinolien.com/deepdive. More episodes are available on darinolien.com as well. Keep diving my friends, keep diving.
Darin: This episode is produced by my team at Must Amplify, an audio marketing company that specializes in giving a voice to a brand and making sure the right people hear it. If you would like or are thinking about doing a podcast or even would like a strategy session to add your voice to your brand in a powerful way, go to www.mustamplify.com/darin. That’s www.mustamplify.com/darin.